just very frustrated with the whole college process
my parents keep taking joe to all of these open houses and portfolio review days for art schools
and they take arthur to vassar all the time for tours and interviews, etc.
but they just completely forget about me. and it’s like please feel free to brag to all of your friends about my sat score but it’s not worth anything if i don’t get my college application shit together.
and i ask for even a little help with the t w e n t y s e v e n supplement essays i’ve found myself having to write and arthur just says “i don’t want to help you. that’s why i already did my stuff” and my mom creates lists of things i need to help her with that are more important
like mother you have been to college twice already. while i appreciate that you’d like a phd, i need to go to college
and then my dad is always just too busy
and joe will say he’ll help but then he’ll just type out random, funny answers to questions that don’t actually have anything to do with me
and like i wish i just had someone who was like “yeah! i really want to help you with your shit”
but nobody does, even when i ask
and it freaks me out because like just because i don’t know what i want to do doesn’t mean i can’t do anything but it does mean i don’t have anything to look forward to
i can’t be like oh this is all bs but it’s worth is so i can grow up and do ___ and be ___
like it’s kinda just all bs for me
and that’s pretty much all i’m feeling tonight